Author: Sean Wynn


Uber Fest interviews. part 1

The Radics:

Sean: Tell us a bit about yourselves, a basic bio, where you’re from and how you guys met.

Blake: We are The Radics, we’ve been together for almost three years now and we wanted to make a band so we put some ads on Facebook. We’ve met these guys and I’m so happy that we get to make music with them.  We are currently touring the east coast, trying to spread our music.

Sean: There are some obvious influences such as Stevie Wonder and Led Zeppelin (note Sean meant Pink Floyd and as the night progressed we learnt that if there is one thing he struggles with, it is band names). Are there any other things that influenced your music that might not be as explicit?

Blake:  Yea behind the curtains there are some influences that are more subliminal like the 1975, Inxs, our drummer is a big pop rock fan so he loves a lot of those bands. That’s the most fun thing about making a song, bringing all these modern ideas and watching all those [classic] characteristics shape them.

Carey: So obviously you guys have a new E.P out and you guys kill it live. So, what’s it been like translating your stuff into the studio?

Blake: Well, we actually produced the E.P ourselves at home. So it was a very relaxed and time taken process. It wasn’t rushed or influenced by anyone other than us four so we love the fact that it came out exactly the way we wanted to. When you get into a studio and you bring in producers you find things get shaped and you lose main ideas and thing go out the window. But if you just sit around with the people making the music, who all know what they want, it’s easy then.

Sean: So what’s the writing process been like for the E.P?

Blake: We wrote the four songs over the three years that we’ve been together. Some of them are a lot newer like the single [slow down] while “Little Redress” and “Rules” are the older ones. My brother I and would just show our ideas to our band members and they would just put their little spin on things.



Sean: Hey guys, how did you think your set went?

Christine:  It went great! The crowd was really into it and I think it went well.

Sean: So I was noticing all sorts of early 80s and 70s influences like early thrash and some female fronted glam metal. What would you say are your influences?

Christine: Sound Garden, Heart, Living Colour.

Leigh: A little bit of led Zeppelin and definitely some Iron Madden.

Sean: Do you guys have any releases coming up soon?

Leigh: We do. We are about to finish an E.P right now so just keep an eye out on our social media.

Sean: So you said you had a song about a beer coaster. What’s all that about?

Christine: It’s called “The Wrong Kind Of Mistake” and the coaster said “Losing is the wrong kind of mistake” and I though “That is so True!”.

Sean: How long have you been together?

Leigh: It’s been about two years together.

Christine: The main song writers anyway.

Leigh: Yea, we’ve been friends for many years while playing in different bands and thought that we should step out on our own for a change.

Christine: We really started getting it all on board since about February this year.

Leigh: And Ian, our bassist, is the newest member and has been around for about two years.

Sean: It sounds like you guys have a lot of experience. Are there any lessons you would give to younger bands? Things to look out for?

Leigh: Look out for? Definitely you finances and count the money. Also practice.

Christine: It’s just like going to the gym. You got to keep practicing to get it in muscle memory.


The Revengers:

Sean: How did you think you set went?

Matt: Yea good, had a lot of fun and got a few laughs which is good.

Sean: It was fast and intense with plenty of short songs. It defiantly felt like punk rock. Aside from that though, there was some rockabilly vibes coming from you music. What else do you think is your main influences?

Matt: The Ramones are our biggest influences and a bit of tang bottle rocket I guess as well. That’s about it.

Joel: We all have very different styles that we listen to as musicians. I’m anywhere from punk, rock, metal, 80s glam metal any of that stuff. We all get influences from different stuff.

Sean: So you guys just dropped a new album. What has been your writing approach for this record?

Matt: I’ve written a majority of them. Luke, the retard, has written a few of them. I write the basic structure of it and the boys add their twist to it.

Sean: What’s it like being a punk band from Bendigo? Do you feel at home there or do you often see yourselves having to go out to get shows?

Matt: I think Melbourne is more accepting of punk. Bendigo is more of a metal and hard rock scene but yea, we fit in. We have a small pocket and we’re not too pop-ey so the metal bands don’t dislike us. We are aggressive and have some good subject matters so they like us.

Carey: You guys have got some quality banter going on. Do you guys ever practice that during session?

Joel: Nah, we just bounce off each other on stage. If you rehearse it people can tell if you have so you’re better off not. Plus we can’t act

Sean: Any plans after Uber Fest?

Joel: We have a few shows lined up in Melbourne, Bendigo and Ballarat. No actually tours but just a few shows to pump up the album and sell as many copies as possible.


Keneniah 15:22

Sean: What made you guys get into music? As most of you are family members, what was it that made you think that these were the guys to make music with?

Daniel: I just needed something to do.

Joel: Really what we were all looking at, because we were a part of a band in our church up in Queensland, we were wanting to go out and see other things, going to pubs and playing at pubs.

Sean: It’s a very Dream Theater meets Mega Death feel to your guy’s music. Was that intentional or are there other bands that influenced you?

Joel: Influences are Dream Theater, Petra, Decipher down, up beat rock bands that are out their having the time of their lives.

Sean: What is the reasoning behind the specific Bible verse as your name? Does it hold and personal meaning?

Joel: Pretty much, our old name was “The Way” and someone else had already taken that, so we decided to go through The Bible, as we are Christians,  and the one that came to us, as he was the leader of pray in Israel, was the name Keneniah, which also means made by god. Later on we decided to tag on 15:22 which was the reference to the meaning of his name.

Carey: So you said you were originally based in Queensland but have now moved to Melbourne. What led to that change?

Daniel: It was a big turn of events. Our ex-drummer had some health problems and had to come down here. He said that if we came down here that we could get some work. So we decided to come down. But nothing happened, we didn’t get any work and he ended up leaving. So we’ve done it hard.

Sean: So how are you finding the Melbourne scene?

Daniel: It’s different. There are a lot more metal bands down here than there are up in Queensland. But it’s good being a band that is totally different to everything else out there. That Dream Theater vibe just came about us just trying to put keyboard into every single song and we though it sounded pretty good.

Sean: Any E.Ps or tours coming up?

Joel: At the moment we are in the process of recording our own stuff at home. I’m an audio engineer, not fully qualified yet but will be soon, so if anyone wants a recording just let us know.



Sean: Hey, guys how did you think the set went?

Nick: Good, everything went smoothly. Everything went well.

Yaz: Different crowd from what we are used to.

Nick: Yea, didn’t get as much banter out as we wanted to but its always good play.

Sean:  You guys have a very obvious house and R and B influence. Who would you say are your main influences?

Nick: It’s a mixed back. I like all things electronic and chill like James Blake and things like that.

Yaz: I’m a bit more R and B fan myself.

Carey: Just wondering, with the name, if it’s a Niki Lauda reference?

Yaz: yea it is. Most people think it’s a play on words for louder.

Sean: So how have you guys found it being an R and B group in what is a mostly punk and metal scene?

Nick: Yea it’s an interesting mix being a house group that doesn’t DJ. Not many clubs will have sets with live music. So we have to sort of play in different venues. Obviously we can’t just play in pubs that mainly play cover songs because that’s the wrong crowd.  So it’s an interesting challenge trying to find places.

Sean: Do you find that you have to venture out far to get gigs?

Nick: Yes and No. The gigs are obviously harder to find but we also just give everything a go. Obviously more inner city is where the scene is at though.

Yaz: Also getting help from other artists in the same genera and style is also important. So we have to stick together and help each other out.

Carey: So you guys had an E.P out recently?

Nick: Yea, an E.P in May. It’s called back beach. We didn’t play too much of it tonight.

Yaz: Yea mainly newer stuff.

Nick: The E.P is a little bit more chilled and laid back. It’s good to get an E.P out there so that people kind of know what we are about.

Sean: So what’s the song writing process been fo you guys?

Nick: So I usually do the music and Yaz typically does the vocals. So I’ll send him a raw mix of a track and He’ll send me a recording of some vocals. The E.P is called back beach because it was all recorded in my beach house.  We just decided to get together and record it and get it all together.


Infernal Bliss

Sean: You guys have a very strong pop punk and warped tour vibe about yourselves. What would you say is your biggest influence?

Ash: We’ve all got really different influences.

Scott: Yea, I’ve got a lot of Tool influences, a lot of prog-rock influences and alternative stuff like smashing pumpkins.

Ash: I love stuff like pop punk.

Bree: I like anything from Slayer to Hillary Duff.

Lucas: I’m a big 90s guy like Faith No More or Nirvana. But all of our influences all cross over. We all share a lot in common too.

Sean: So where are you guys based? Are you guys Melbourne or elsewhere?

Scott: Three of us are from Ballarat and our drummer and our lead guitarist are from Melton.

Sean: So how are you finding Melbourne compared to Ballarat or Melton?

Lucas: There is no Melton scene.

Ash: Ballart is pretty good. There really supportive of the locals. So for another band from Melbourne, for example, to get a gig in Ballarat is actually really hard.

Scott: Yea, they’ll give you the “You’re not from around here” vibe. Though if you’re from Ballarat they’ll be a lot friendlier.

Carey: We were talking to the Revengers from Bendigo. Their scene seems pretty receptive to them however it seems to lean more towards metal. So where do you think you fit in?

Scott: We are a bit more punk in Ballarat I’d say, compared to the Indie rock bands that just turn up on the main street all over café bars.

Sean: So you guys said that you are releasing an E.P in a month?

Lucas: Yea our self-titled E.P should be out in the middle of September.

Sean: What was the song writing process for that?

Lucas: A bit of everything. We’ve got some songs that our other guitarist would write and we would just add our bits to it. Sometimes Bree would write an idea and we would all finish it in an hour.

Bree: I write a lot of the lyrics generally.

Sean: Any tours or shows coming up?

Ash: Kind of. We have a few spread out shows to promote our E.P. September 19th we’re playing Ballarat, we’re playing Bendigo October 2nd and playing the rev sometime in November.



Sean: You guys definitely had one of the more visually engaging shows I’ve ever seen. I was telling Carey that if there was one band I had to see it was Morth. You’re sound is very classic Metal, like Iron Maiden or Judaist Priest. What bands do you think personally got you into making music?

Dylan: I’m into Wasp, Kiss, Motely Crew.

Billy: Same, Motely Crew or any other 80s act.

Sean: Do you guys have any E.Ps coming out?

Billy: We have a collector’s series singles coming out probably around Christmas time. Each single comes with a poster and if you buy all the singles then you get the compete poster.

Sean: So what’s your writing process been like for these singles?

Dylan: We do practices every weekend. When it comes to writing we all pitch in.

Billy: Yea, when somebody comes up with an idea we all usually jump in.

Dylan: We just fix them try to fit it together and make a song out of it. If someone writes lyrics I’ll have a read, fix them up and put them in a song. Everyone participates in the writing process.

Sean: How have you found Melbourne?

Dylan: It’s been great. The crowds are great and everyone is really into it.

Sean: Is Melbourne you main scene or do you venture elsewhere?

Billy: We do often travel for shows. Our music video that we are filming is being shot in Geelong. It’s free entry and we are doing a show afterwards(August 30 Barwon club,4pm).

Sean: What’s the Geelong scene like?

Billy: We’ve only played there a few times but we’ve had a good reception each time. But we play show in Bendigo and a lot of other places too.

Carey: So how do you go about getting your huge live show together?

Billy: One thing just led to another and everyone kept throwing in ideas and here we are. Whatever works, works and if it doesn’t it gets tossed.

Sean: So with your subject matter is there any over arcing themes?

Dylan: Usually someone just gets an idea of something to write about and we just pull it together.

Billy: As far as our songs go we don’t tend to stick to a certain theme.  We’ve got party songs, horror songs and get into the crowd songs.

Brandon: Most of the songs start with a guitar riff and then we add lyrics.



Dead on Acid

Sean: You guys where crazy on stage. I was breathless the entire time I was watching you guys. Where are you guys from?

Tim: I’m from the south-east suburbs and these two guys [Brody and Alex] are from Narre Warren.

Sean: So you guys come from the Djent/metalcore scene.

Tim: Yea it’s fucking terrible!

Sean: I guess you guys thought “fuck this” then when forming your band?

Tim: We just though “let’s play punk”. It’s easy and it gets the message across. You get to scream as much as you like and you don’t have to be good at your instrument.

Sean: I love how blunt you guys are with your songs. For example “I want to fuck a red headed girl” as opposed to the genre trope of obscuring everything behind “poetic lyricism”.

Tim: Yea we don’t dance around bullshit.

Brody: Yea fuck that.

Sean: I see you literally cut yourself on stage. What inspired that?

Tim: Well Morth were promoting themselves as a shock rock band so we decide that we can take that one step further.

Brody: We thought that it would be a little bit more shocking.

Tim: We thought it was going to be hard to follow up Morth as they were really good. But everyone left after two songs so they missed out on some rad public self-harm.

Sean: Do you guys have any E.Ps coming out?

Tim: We just recoded a Demo in my mate, Gavin’s, bedroom and he still hasn’t sent me the final mixes yet. So if you just check out Dead on Acid on Facebook we’ll have a demo out soon.

Sean: What inspired you guys to make music and to perform the way you do?

Tim: We mostly just wanted to do it. Musically, my main influence is Nirvana. But the stage presence and lyricism is all me coming out.

Sean: Is there anything you want to say to your fans?

Brody: To all our potential fans out there, please kill yourself. That’s all.

Tim: You often hear musicians say that “If my music helps out one person then I’ve done my job”. Well if one person kill’s themselves because of Dead on Acid then we have completed our goal.


Sisters Doll

Sean: You guys definitely call back to the days of Glam metal and the L.A strip. Guys like Motely Crew and maybe even Steel Panther, is there anything outside that you lie?

Monroe: All sorts of stuff really. We are pretty diverse in our tastes.  I like even some top 40s stuff.

Lipz: Anything that has a good melody.

Monroe: Yea, but most of it being Glam metal from the 70s and 80s with some 90s stuff too.

Sean: You mentioned that you’ve been touring Adelaide recently. How was it and how does it compare to Melbourne?

Monroe: Good. It’s a bit quieter. We played a show at bridge way hotel in Adelaide on Thursday and Saturday. Thursday was a bit quiet but the Saturday night had 150 people there. It was great. But the Melbourne scene is definitely boom with more venues.

Sean: You guys are now currently promoting a debut album?  How was the writing process on that?

Monroe: One of us will come up with a part and everyone else will play with the idea. It’s a collaborative effort. Some person brings their own idea and we build on it from there.

Sean: You’re now going to release something early next year?

Monroe: We are hoping to start recording our next album early next year. But right now we are working on Vinyl releases for our debut album. Those should be due in September and you can pre order them off our Facebook page.


Parmy Dhillon – Advertising Whore

I think I have written myself into somewhat of a “journalistic” corner; a type cast if you will. You see, ever since my first two reviews there is now this expectation that every time a song proves unpopular around Radio Monash it is up to me to give it some form of public execution, by way of a snarky protracted review. This has left me feeling concerned as I have, in a short space of time, become a bit of a meme around the Radio Monash Lounge, who reviews solely to live up to the expectations of others rather than to reveal insights into my experience with music. This puts me in an interesting position when I am handed a song that is in need of said public execution and I find that cannot bring myself to do it in good faith.


The song in question is Parmy Dhillon’s Advertising Whore. I want to make this clear that I am not saying that I like the song but that it does not deserve to be known as the musical equivalent of the Ebola virus. Why, you might ask? If you remember my review of Red Foo’s Juicy Wiggle,  I was particularly inflammatory back then, as it was – what I consider anyway – the musical equivalent of a very ugly midlife crisis. It was a man in his forties attempting to build up some street credibility by making a song about a dance move that hit its peak popularity almost a year after the song’s release, while simultaneously displaying the same attitude towards alcohol consumption that aggressively heterosexual closeted dudebros display towards “pussy” and “getting laid”. It was contrived, cynical and well deserving of the flack it received. If I wanted to experience anything more saddening I would need to go around to nursing homes and observe the more mentally compromised guests spending their last years looking through the only window to the outside world as they try to make sense of what their existence has become.


On the other hand, Advertising Whore is a silly pub rock song with no aspirations further than being a silly pub rock song and nothing else. It’s not self-aware but it’s knowing of its place. To be honest there is something to admire about releasing music, in a time where all of its peers dream of being the musical equivalent War and Peace, which is personal, simple and lacks any sense of pretension.


However, this isn’t to say that all is well in the Parmy United Party. The very nature of this song lends itself to only being suitable to a particular time and place with a very niche audience. Advertising Whore’s very simplistic nature proves to be its own downfall as the song feels uneventful and uninteresting. The chord progression of the song consists purely of a plagal cadence, which is nowhere near as exotic as it sounds, and throughout the entire duration, the song makes no effort to venture elsewhere. It’s as if he sat down with the guitar and said to himself “well, I know plenty of classic songs have been written with only four chords so logically I should be able to make a pretty good song with only two”.


If one is to avoid using hyperbole when describing this song, its one distinguishing feature is repetition. You are going to very familiar with the vocal delivery and its melodic contours and after a few listens be well versed with what the lyrics have to say. The lyrics are at best dismissible and at worst cringe inducing, with the subject matter being a very uninteresting look at conformity punctuated with variations of the theme /Can I get a hey hey!?/ which, in a smarter song, would lend it some humour and irony but here only further displays its own lack of self-awareness.
In closing, I doubt there would be many that find this song to be particularly moving outside of a drunken crowd in a local pub. Its repetitive nature and sub-par lyrics detract from any Cathartic fun that one would get from an old Nickleback song leaving the song feeling a bit lifeless. With this in mind, does this well-meaning song deserve the same despotism as Juicy Wiggle or some other cynical gesture by faceless industry types to feign relevancy as it attempts to homogenise the medium?

Song can be found here


Navy Blue – Alice (Single Review)

After living up to the cliché of the savvy online music journalist, laying into mainstream artists for being unoriginal and stale and making sure that I keep my irony proof helmet on at all times, while simultaneously fantasying about the idea of said artists stumbling upon my reviews and having their  world crumble around them as they read the over long opinions of a 19 year old as he desperately throws rocks in the ocean to make the sea levels rise, I  now feel obligated to bring this cliché to its logical next step by informing you of some hip new cool indie band that you probably have never heard of.

Bendigo band Navy Blue has released their debut single Alice, an atmospheric alternative rock affair that makes passing glances at ambient rock. What  immediately strikes you is the song’s ability to deliver upon a very moody and atmospheric vibe, with the song featuring vocals with heavy reverb,  very thick sounding clean guitars with plenty of delay and the use of looming guitar drones sprinkled across the song. However, like a middle age woman on a treadmill going through her midlife crisis health kick, the song somewhat loudly and proudly goes nowhere post initial chorus.

Initially the song starts out promising, with its haunted vocal delivery and great use of textures during the verse however hits a minor snag once the chorus comes around. Like my early adolescence, the chorus is marred by a somewhat awkward transition. This is made evident by a vocal performance that is off the mark just enough to be perceptible but not so much as to say it is a particularly bad performance, a distorted guitar tone that is noticeably lacking in presence comparted to its clean counterpart and a sudden abandoning of any interesting layering or ambiance, with the droning guitar pushed well into the background of the piece’s overall texture. It leaves such a seemingly important part of the song feeling bare and undercooked compared to the strong opening verse. Despite all that though, and to the song’s credit, these issues can be set aside for those of you that just want a pretty decent hook to rock out to.

However the issues don’t stop there. At about two minutes the song seemingly knocks off early, thinking that its work for the day is done only to realise halfway home that it still has another two minutes to fill. It attempts to reconcile this with a token attempt at a bridge but soon brings you back in with a build up that promises something big but only delivers us the same chorus with largely the same setbacks as the first one. This isn’t to say that they don’t try to send it off with a bang; a clear effort is made by adding an ambient clean passage over the top of the later stages of the chorus but however by that time I’m not as invested as I once was and the impact is lost on me.



This brings me to my biggest issue with the single. It’s a four-minute song that feels like a two-minute track. Normally you would think that this is great because you are so captivated while listening to the song you didn’t notice how much time went by. Unfortunately in this scenario it feels shorter because honestly, there is only about two minutes of noteworthy material. The latter half of the song feels like filler by way of copying and pasting most of the first half of the song. There is nothing interesting explored nor some cool new idea and not even any development of previous ones – it’s second half is largely the same as the first.

Despite all this though, none of what I have previously said detracts too much from my ability to enjoy what is on offer. It isn’t a song that moves me in any profound way nor will it stay with me for any long period of time. However, the vocal lines are very catchy and enjoyable to sing along to, the song nails the aesthetics and vibe that it was going to and truth be told, if I heard this song live there would be no doubt in my mind that I would be definitely rocking out to this and having fun doing so.

My overall thoughts on the song. Just the tip.

Song can be found here


Nickleback- She Keeps Me Up At

You want to know what keeps me up at night? Entropy. Not the entropy that is used by physicists to sugar coat the fact that yes, we are all doomed, regardless of how many baby seals we hug or chickens we give a proper burial before we dig them back up to eat them, but the pleb definition (Don’t worry I am not an /r/ atheist member. I do not spend my nights stroking my Neil DeGreases Tyson body pillow, also known as Taifu, or kick tombstones while showing off my lacklustre physics education I received from the university of edgy memes and Guy Fawkes masks. #idigress) that when a system no longer receives energy from a source it tends toward disorder and chaos. You see in my brief existence I find that this rule may not need to only apply to the universe and can be seen in all areas of life. Relationships, fitness, mental state or academic work all require some input of work and energy if they are to not descend into chaos. The most depressing thing of all is that this too applies to things we enjoy. The implications of this suggest that no matter what we do, nothing can ever truly save us from the tedium and helplessness of a disordered and empty life. Nothing is there to stop the things we love to going from an escape to another mechanical activity that requires more of you precious work. At some stage you are going to run out of energy to give and the activities that once were things that gave so much will soon be things that ask for so much more. So this leaves us with a question. Do we soldier on, fooling ourselves into thinking that it is still worth it, or do we bit the bullet and accept the pointlessness of it all.

Well you will be glad to know that Nickelback have inadvertently thrown in their own two cents on the issue with the song “She Keeps Me Up at”. A song about a band who have clearly given up on the inside but haven’t got the courage to admit it to themselves. Wait sorry, that should read ” A song WRITTEN by a band who have clearly given up on the inside but have got a quota to meet.” Listening to this song has been the most confusing moment in my entire life since reading a really bad plot synopsis on the entire metal gear series. I am just astonished that no one thought to ask “who is this meant to appeal to?” Or that there are a group of record label executives that still think that Earth, Wind and Fire is what the kids these days listen to. If we go off the assumption that Nickleback was made aware of this song via a passive aggressive memo from corporate, then what producer would think that Nickleback of all bands would be a suitable fit for this song. Here we have a band synonymous with generic arena rock, and all the worst things about 90’s lets not be too Heavy metal, let’s give them a song that someone like maroon five would crap out.

The song has this pulsating back beat, just in case any of you out there lose where the beat is in this intricate caffeine-free diet coke junior Ferris wheel of an experience, and guitar riff “inspired” by the opening riff from “Play That Funky Music White Boy” with a spanky guitar tone so weak that as soon as the song picks up get immediately lost in the awkward mess of it all. Any focus that could have been regained in the chorus is lost by all the guitars rapidly changing pan, snares with reverse delay and question answer vocals to wrap up said chorus. But what would a white guy funk song be without some delicate peppering of tasteful wah pedal. Though all this wanky guitar stuff is lost by a bass guitar that can’t decide if, like the vocals, it wants to be in the forefront or to hang back and add the convoluted mess that is the song’s background texture(which if, like me, you are listening to this song late at night will have you constantly readjusting the volume knob on your speakers). After the first chorus there really isn’t much else, musically, to discuss as everything else is just an offering of something you just heard, while the bridge sounds like a compilation of rejected ideas for the chorus hook. Lyrical content? Take a guess. Superficially the song is about a girl to who the singer deems sexually attractive enough that he desperately wants to be with her. Any attempt to read deeper into the lyrics sees you finding that they are so vague that they can really be applied to anything. Everyone seems to be making a big deal out of the line “Coca-Cola roller coaster” which, awkward yes, isn’t as bad as the line “everybody wants to be their sisters mister”(“Their” should probably be “the” but even Chad Kroger’s annunciation is so vague that lyrics in the description box would not have helped).

To be honest though, compared to the last song I reviewed first impressions left me with a smile on my face, as opposed to just feeling sad, as I feel privileged to have the opportunity to fully witness a song tranced normal criticism and in a few years to come see it elevated into the “so bad it’s good” category. But I don’t know what’s more concerning. The fact that right now people are defending this “bold new direction” or that at some point some little twerp is going to write in the comments section “born the wrong generation”.

I wonder what the reception would be if the band travelled back in time to the 1800s. Probably something along the lines of “That was shit. Give me my nickel back.”

Song can be found here:

Kill me now

Red Foo – Juicy Wiggle

When I first heard that the two members of LMFAO were uncle and nephew I was a bit taken aback. You see the issue for me wasn’t that one of them was an uncle, the issue was figuring out which one was the uncle. Is it the illegitimate offspring of Kirk Hammet and Slash (Sky Blue) or the one who seems time locked to 1970s America where it was socially acceptable to un-ironically have an afro, wear bedazzled glasses and stroll about in what are glorified tracksuits as evening wear (Red Foo)?
Thankfully, one of them has finally stepped forward to put this age old question of mine to rest. Beca use only the seedy uncle who is desperate to look as though he is “down” with the “homies” would release as song such as “Juicy Wiggle”.

For those of you playing at home: Rapper, Producer, Singer (lol X-Factor), local computer salesman and tennis player (it’s on his Wikipedia page as of the writing of this review so I’m going to roll with it) Red Foo has dropped a new single titled “Juicy Wiggle“. As of the writing of this review I’m not entirely sure how to label this song. Is it a banger, dance music, house music or even disco? For the sake of simplicity I’ll just call it EDM.
Now don’t get me wrong, this isn’t because of some stroke of genius on Red Foo’s behalf, it’s to do with the fact that this song feels so bloody middle of the road.  I mean Christ, the weird verse build-up hybrid thing it has going on is based upon the twelve bar blues structure, which as far as clichés are concerned is right up there with “letting the music take control” and having Hans Zimmer score your movie soundtrack.

This is a song whose main ambition is to inform you of a new dance, with other notable songs in this field including and not limited to : “The Macarena“, “Crank That“, “Teach Me How To Dougie” and “The Hokey Pokey“. To be honest, based on Red Foo’s instructions I feel as though I’m more likely to offend Peter Garret than actually pull of the Juicy Wiggle.

Furthermore, the drop on this song bears the same attitude that all radio friendly bangers have , a super obnoxious timbre on the synth-lead with a melody that just sounds busy and unfocused while making sure that the bass accents the off beats. For it is the nail that sticks out that will get hammered in.
The drop also feels somewhat creepy as Red Foo repeatedly whispers “get juicy” in the same way that a boost juice manager, inspired by Rolf Harris,  would whisper to their employee of the month.

To his credit, he does at least try to do something noteworthy when he attempts to get the drop to follow the chord progression of the twelve bar blues, but much like his attempts at rhyming, because apparently no one was present to inform him that riddle and middle do not rhyme with wiggle, gets somewhat fumbled in the execution.
There could be something to be said about Red Foo’s choice to use a twelve bar in the context of an EDM song, but this is a genre so notorious for its formulaic nature, that artists of that genre can have two or more of their songs played on top of each other and none would be the wiser. At this rate, to be considered innovative all one would have to do is have a verse featuring Pitbull and be produced by Simon Cowell.

His choice to release a song now about the Juicy Wiggle, a dance that has already passed its peak popularity in its city of origin,  is telling of a larger problem.

He is THAT guy.

To clarify, Red Foo is that acquaintance that can’t make rent and is therefore kicked out of his house, forcing him to move into someone’s spare couch, with that someone being the Australian entertainment industry. They let Red Foo crash under the condition that “it will be like a week or so until I get back on my feet” and even give him some help by getting him a cushy job. Before you know it, it’s been a few months, he has changed his mailing address and to the disdain of the residents of Mullumbimby, he doesn’t look like he is going anywhere in a hurry.

For those of you still with me, the song is very paint by numbers with it at times feeling a bit unintentionally comical, much like a geriatric saying “four-twenty blaze it” with a straight face, and in all is probably going to get substantial radio time and be enjoyed by people you wouldn’t want to invite to a dinner party because they would probably ruin your hardwood floor.

Red Foo’s other notable work:

Sean Wynn